Why some people fear intimacy



  • 1 They were hurt in the past

    When some people get hurt in the past by close ones, they might develop a fear of intimacy in order to protect themselves from further hurt. In such a case, the person avoids getting close to others to not get hurt.

  • 2 They fear commitment

    Some people have got a fear of commitment. Those people view intimacy as an important step that leads to a serious relationship, which is why they fear intimacy. Those people avoid intimacy in order to avoid relationships.

  • 3 They feel inferior

    Inferiority feelings and feelings of inadequacy can make a person afraid of exposing themselves to others. In such a case, the person might choose to avoid intimacy to not give others the chance to discover their flaws. See what causes feelings of inferiority.

  • 4 They had distant parents

    Children who had distant parents who never allowed them to experience true intimacy might develop a fear of intimacy in the future. In such a case, the person avoids intimacy because they don't feel comfortable trying something that they are not familiar with.

  • 5 They are paranoid

    Paranoid people do their best to keep their information private. For a paranoid person, intimacy is considered a threat since it exposes them to others and makes them vulnerable.

  • 6 To maintain a certain image

    Some people project a certain image to others that might not be very true. They avoid intimacy to keep that image intact. A man could try to seem very strong and avoid intimacy to not show that he has a weak side.

  • 7 They have trust issues

    People who have trust issues can hardly trust others with their private information. Because proper intimacy involves sharing one's secrets with others, some of those who have trust issues fear intimacy.

  • 8 Fear of strangers

    According to a study, women who were not taught to trust strangers were more likely to develop a fear of intimacy. If a person developed fear of strangers then they might have problems developing intimacy.

  • 9 They were abused

    If a child was abused by close ones in any possible way then they might develop an intense fear of intimacy. In such a case, the person avoids getting close to others to avoid letting the bad past happen again.

  • 10 Fear of sexual interactions

    In some cases, a person might fear intimacy because they are afraid of sexual interactions. A man who has doubts about their sexual performance might actually fear intimacy.

  • 11 Parental intolerance or rejection

    If the parent was intolerant to the negative emotions of the child or if they met their emotional needs with rejection then the child might learn to hide their emotional needs and never express them.

  • 12 It makes them feel vulnerable

    To some people, exposing themselves to others makes them feel vulnerable and insecure. Those people avoid intimacy in order not to seem vulnerable or weak.